Monday, August 25, 2008

Visiting the nuns; out of habit

"Get thee to a nunnery!"

Well, I did it. I spent a whole Friday evening in a convent and not one bolt of lightening struck the building. I know what you are thinking, "that Malinda is really living life on the edge over there in Ireland... wild Friday nights with the nuns." Yes, move over Britney, we are spinning way out of control here.

Manus' mother is great friends with Sister Teresa Landy, a nun in Callan (town in Kilkenny) and she had us out for a fabulous four-course dinner. Not only is Sr. Teresa a nun, she is also quite a gourmand*. (I mean that in the good way).


I don't know if it's because I am not Catholic or maybe they do things differently here in Ireland, but there are a lot of things about nuns that I didn't know...

  • Did you know that nuns don't have to wear the habits if they don't want to?

  • Did you know that nuns drink? And not just holy water. I'm not naming names, but I have met some nuns here that could drink me under the table.

  • Did you know that nuns go to college?

  • Did you know they can't have a car 'cause of their vow of poverty?

  • Did you know that in Ireland you don't even say grace before a meal? - not even in God's house.


I know it sounds sacrilegious, but a convent is so much like a sorority house. The "AlphaOmega House", if you will. Can you imagine living in a house full of women? I don't care if you are on direct speaking terms with God, he cant help you to like everyone... there has to be some passive aggressive back stabbing going on in there.

Can you imagine if they all, eh, 'cycle' together? You don't want to piss off a PMSing nun. Talk about eternal damnation! Are there cliques in the convent? Are there the cool nuns and the nuns no one wants to hang out with? While we were there I saw a nun eating all by herself. Is that because she doesn't have any friends? If someone asks her how many friends she has, will she answer "Nun." ? (!!!!!)

In the evening sometimes Sr. Teresa will invite some of the gals into her room to watch tv. Do they get cable? Is it a rule that they avert their eyes when there is a sex scene? If they peek, god will surely know. Do they discuss who should be voted off Big Brother or who should win American Idol?

There is so much that I don't know, but from what I do know of what Sr. Teresa does each day, I think if I could be a nun as a day job, it would be great. She went to college to learn cookery and home economics, so that is why she cooks like a 5 star chef. She teaches home-ec to the girls at the school, is a career counsellor, visits the elderly at the old folks home (will even take some of their clothes to mend a tear or darn a sock for them), does charity work and Sr. Teresa is an international tour guide. She goes on about 5-6 trips a year all over the world. My MIL goes on one each summer. Off hand, I wouldn't think a trip with a bunch of nuns would be all that much fun, but these are not your run-of-the-mill, Sound of Music nuns. She has the perfect job. Aside of course from the chastity, poverty and obedience things...

Mary's husband Tom says that nuns, on average, live longer than married women. He thinks its because they don;t have the stress of children. Silly man. You know as well as I its because they don't have the stress of HUSBANDS.


Yesterday the sun was shining. I had forgotten what it looked like. So to celebrate we went to the park for a picnic brunch. As luck would have it it was the first day of Heritage Week and there was a day of activities planned.
With over 1000 events taking place around the country during Heritage Week, individuals and families across Ireland have the opportunity to get outdoors and experience their local heritage.
We heard the Kilkenny pipe band and marching band. There was a medieval jester and military display, basket making, stone carving, paper working and farmer's market. (could you tell I was reading off the brochure?)

Again we find ourselves watching the backs of the musicians. I am sensing a trend. (see Hoban monument post)
Two men fighting for my affections. Not actually a part of the festival.

Oh! You slay me!!!"

*Usage Note: A gourmet is a person with discriminating taste in food and wine, as is a gourmand. Because gourmand can also mean "one who enjoys food in great quantities" or even "a gluttonous eater," care should be taken to make clear its intended sense. An epicure is much the same as a gourmet, but the word may sometimes carry overtones of excessive refinement. This use of epicure is a misrepresentation of Epicurean philosophy, which, while it professed that pleasure was the highest good, was hardly given to excessive concern with food and drink.

5 comments:

Debbie said...

You're having WAY too much fun over there! It seems those nuns may be a bad influence.

Kristy Hajimihalis said...

I'm trying to think of a clever joke myself, but I came up with Nun.

Orflaith said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
joelle said...

Hello I read with interest your blog about meeting and dining with Sister Theresa Landy and I was hoping to ask a favour of you and if you could email me a photo of Sister Landy. I would like to surprise my husband who was taught to cook by Sister Landy some 22 years ago and it is thanks to her that he is now a fabulous chef. Thank you in advance.

joelle said...

Sorry my email address is joelle34_1@yahoo.com thanks again