Monday, October 6, 2008

Empty Days? Fill some in Folsom

We've been here in Folsom for two weeks now. It is an interesting place. Folsom is a suburb of Sacramento and we live in an area of Folsom known as Broadstone. Broadstone is the name Elliot Homes gave the area when they built it. And that is the best way I can think of to explain it: A corporation built this neighborhood. It's a little creepy. It's a little Disney World, it's a little Stepford, it's completely Agrestic...

We even have an "It's A Grind" next door. Change that, we have EVERYTHING next door. Within a one-mile radius, we have every chain ever created. In fact, that is my challenge. I dare, nay, implore you to find a genre of shop that I couldn't walk to from our apartment. We have a Costco and a Sam's Club. Bed Bath & Beyond and Linens & Things. Ross is right next to Marshalls. There are even two PetSmarts, one on one side of the street, one on the other. Folsom is the polar opposite of Kilkenny. Kilkenny is one-lane roads acting as two. Folsom is a 6 lane street right outside our complex. Kilkenny is limited selection, at best. Folsom is 17 types of over-processed, extra-fattening (and under-appreciated) Hamburger Helper, and they're not making any apologizes for it. It is gluttonous and it is super-sized and it is quintessential America and I love it! I'm twirling my cart through the aisles singing, "The Hills are Alive! with the sound of Starbucks and Sports Authority and Michaels and Quiznos and TACO BELL".

But would I want to live here full-time? No. I'm just a kid in a candy store right now. I'm like the contestant on Survivor that bids $500 for a jar of peanut butter, devouring it in one sitting. I just want it cause I haven't had it. This place is devoid of character. If we want to go out to eat, our choices are Olive Garden, Ruby Tuesdays, Applebees... you get the picture. If you google "Giant Corporate Chain" you'll see a picture of me standing outside Target with my bags from Wal-Mart slurping up Cold Stone Creamery and washing it down with some Jamba Juice. (but I'll be smiling)...

Our "corporate housing solution" brings me right back to my Gainesville days. It is such a college apartment... The layout, the cheap appliances, the poop on the carpet... But it is perfect for us. I meant to take some photos of the place before we wrecked it, but those first few seconds pass by so quickly.

This is the view from our patio. They are building a fourth shopping plaza across the street, are there any stores left to add?

Manus, again showing off his penchant for cutting-edge fashion, jumps into work just minutes after we arrive.
This is the second bedroom. Manus will make this his home office.
Don't call social services on us, but we put poor Katie in the closet... Did I mention that the closets are really huge?

The company that helped us relocate really did a great job making sure we had everything we needed. We knew there would be pots and pans and towels and sheets, but were so surprised to find they'd thought of everything.

It was outfitted in such a way that we felt like we were right in the middle of the Dollar Store..

And a hotel room..

And the bathroom at a wedding reception. C'mon - first aid kit! Shoe polish!?

Even what I refer to as "the mystery closet" - what are those products?


Anonymous said...

OK, many homes do you have now? On how many continents? Just how long/often are you going to be in CA? I guess I was confused. I thought you were going there for a one-time 2-week gig. Maybe I need to pay more attention to what is going on around me.........Jess ;)

malinda said...

If you count my parent's place (and I do) we currently have 4 places that we call home. Its obnoxious, I know. We will be here until Nov.18th,, then miami until Dec.2.

Anonymous said...

I was thinking of you today as we flew from Baltimore to Las Vegas. There was a baby in the seat in front of us, and she had a few fussy moments. It was only a 5-hr flight. I don't know how you kept your sanity (or Katie kept hers) on such a long trip. By the time you're done, she'll be a very well-seasoned traveler.