Thursday, May 8, 2008


I am baking a cake today. From scratch. This is because the Irish HaHa Committee apparently banned Betty Crocker and Duncan Hines from doing what they do best and I cant find any 'just add water, eggs and oil' cake mixes.
This will take all day. I'll tell you about it tomorrow if the cake doesn't render the entire family uncommunicative.

So for today, I give you just a few of the SNIGLETs I was able to find on the internet. Apparently they were first coined by a comedian named Rich Hall who then wrote a book about singlets so some of these are his and some are probably from other people.
Some of them are hysterical because you realize how much we needed a name for them.

Googlegänger— A person with your name who shows up when you google yourself. (you know you have done this)

Quadriboobage—The appearance of having four bosoms caused by wearing a bra that is too small.

Crackberry—For those addicted to their Blackberry (manus)

Carperpetuation (kar-pur-pet-you-ay-shun) n. The act, when vacuuming, of running over a string or a piece of lint at least a dozen times, reaching over and picking it up, examining it, then putting it back down to give the vacuum one more chance. (see "frust" for related item)

Disconfect (dis-kon-fekt) v. To sterilize the piece of confection (lolly) you dropped on the floor by blowing on it, assuming this will somehow 'remove' all the germs.

Elbonics (el-bon-iks) n. The actions of two people maneuvering for one armrest in a movie theater.

Frust (frust) n. The small line of debris that refuses to be swept onto the dust pan and keeps backing a person across the room until he finally decides to give up and sweep it under the rug.

Lactomangulation (lak-to-man-gyu-lay-shun) n. Manhandling the "open here" spout on a milk container so badly that one has to resort to the 'illegal' side.

Peppier (pep-yay) n. The waiter at a fancy restaurant whose sole purpose seems to be walking around asking diners if they want fresh ground pepper.

Phonesia (fo-knee-zhuh) n. The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer.

Pupkus (pup-kus) n. The moist residue left on a window after a dog presses its nose to it.

Sloovers (slew-vuhrz n. pl. Remnants of soap too small to use, but too big to throw away.

Telecrastination (tel-e-kras-tuh-nay-shun) n. The act of always letting the phone ring at least twice before you pick it up, even when you're only six inches away

Decafalon n. The gruelling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.

Sarchasm: n. The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

Bucklint(buck' lint)n. The fine red and blue threads running through new dollar bills.

Bubblic (buh' blik)adj. Addicted to the systematic popping of the bubbles in packing material.

Unfare (un fayr')n. The dollar you owe the cab driver before you've even moved a foot.

Permapression (pur' muh preh shun)n. The discovery that there is no real difference in the various cycles of your washing machine.

Furbula (fer' byew luh)n. The designated chewing area on a dog's back.

Rignition (rig ni' shun)n. The embarrassing action of trying to start one's car with the engine already running.

Mopeeps (moh' peeps)n. People compelled to look through the curtain opening of your motel room as they pass by.

Mummabolic Chorus (mum uh bah' lik ko' rus)n. When three or more people are singing along to a tune and suddenly discover they are all faking their way through the unintelligible lyrics.

Ten bucks for anyone who can use them all in one sentence. I'm kidding of course. I know I have to clarify that for those on the other side of the sarchasm.

And now, your daily dose...

This picture of my Mummum Frum, Katie and cousin Nicholas was taken on our last Saturday in Miami.

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